Welcome To My Personal Donation Page For Mudders Business Solutions Mental Health Awareness Campaign In Partnership With CMHA.
We always hear so much everyday in our lives about mental illness and how so many of our friends, family and loved ones suffer without help. My name is Josh Zhivago and I am the sales and marketing director of Mudders Business Solutions, My story starts 1 day before my 22nd birthday in a cold and snowy January afternoon of the year 2014. I was working for a Calgary based tow company and sent to recover a vehicle in the ditch north of Airdrie in the middle of a major snow storm, that was fine I loved to help others, loved playing in the snow and loved operating a tow truck. As I made my way north I followed a white Nissan Frontier and we followed the slow moving traffic into the icy and blizzard Highway 2. Shortly after passing Airdrie city limits the truck lost control, crossed the median and made contact with a loaded tractor trailer going south into Airdrie now with a trail of debris behind. As anyone would do I slammed on my breaks and slid into the shoulder, jumped out and later realizing I never even put my truck in park. I grabbed a pry bar from my truck platform and jumped through the icy ditch and began trying to pry the door open and save a life of a innocent human who had a family waiting at home. What felt like hours later others passing by realized something was wrong and had stopped to lend a hand but with no success as the mangled mess was just too much for what gear I had. We held the man and comforted him into what would be his final moments and keeping him calm I told him he was a hero in life and that his family loved him and that help was just around the corner just as we could hear sirens getting closer and closer. I'll save the gruesome details for my own memory and in respect to the family but after I swapped my position with a firefighter my mind just stopped, I paused, I froze I didn't know what to do. I sat in my truck looking ahead while the company radio continued to broadcast dispatch looking to talk to me and get an updated time of my arrival to my call still waiting north of me. After some time I realized the sounds around me, I acknowledged dispatch and advised my situation and what felt like seconds later the phone rings, I pick up and after asking if my truck is okay the next words shocked me.... "Okay get moving we have calls holding" it was like nothing in life mattered accept a few bucks to them, no life, nothing. I called it quits that day I was done, I moved on and found other great careers and just kept the memories in the back of the mind, never speaking about it and avoiding it because back then the whole stigma around mental health was still poor, no one cared, no one listened, help was never really talked about and you most likely ended up being labeled with some selfish title for ever speaking about mental health. Today I continue to work on learning to cope with those memories and how to not let them affect me, some days are good others are not but with the help of an amazing doctor eventually it gets easier. I often wonder who the man was, and how his family is doing, what I could have done better or differently to help him. I never felt any anger for him it wasn't like it was his fault and accidents happen. I never blamed him and I only got a few details but I was told he was a paramedic on his way in to help due to the storm rolling through and in return his life changed, and so did mine. Sadly I do blame myself for not doing more, and because of such beliefs every day I live with PTSD. Now in 2021 we have much more support for mental health and yes we could always use more. As I manage and build the Mudders brand I'm working to also help a cause close to my heart, and millions of others and so as we move forward our goal for 2022 is to make monthly donations to Canadian Mental Help organizations from proceeds of our services and allowing our friends and family to help us achieve our goal! Stay tuned and remember not all illnesses are visible.
Welcome to the Team Mudders's mental health fundraiser page. Buster the mental health ambassador bear is on a mission to end the stigma!